Tag Archive | bitterness

The Power of Forgiving Ourselves. Yes… YOU.

Peace comes from forgiveness.

Peace comes from forgiveness.

When embarking on the infertility journey,  the maze of emotions we move through can be mind-blowing.  Anger, bitterness, resentment are some, as well as the old regulars.. sadness, trepidation, grief, elation, expectation and hope.

I have noticed how many women, have such high expectations of themselves, their bodies, the ability to function ‘as only a woman should’.  And if they don’t , thinking of themselves as failures to themselves, their spouses, and the world.  I know – I’ve been there.

Some of the most profound and liberating work I have done, has been forgiving myself.    As you would have heartfelt compassion ( knowing that you would not wish this on your worst enemy)  how about shining that light of compassion on yourself.  Acknowledge that you have or are doing the best that you can do, in that moment.   That you don’t have control over the outcome.    We women, do try a lot to be ‘perfect’ at everything we do.   If the universe, source or God was looking at you now, he would see someone perfect in his eyes, with all your talents and all your flaws.  That is perfection.   Know that it is okay to be yourself as you are.  Acknowledge your sadness, your anger, and frustration, particularly when they are aimed at yourself.  Allow those emotions to surface, … and then let them pass.    Say to yourself, from your heart, that you forgive yourself –  first of all for being so hard on yourself, and secondly for having such high expectations of ourselves, and of course if you have anything else to forgive yourself for.  Spend some time nurturing yourself, and reminding yourself of the gifts you bring to this world.


Coach Louise

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PS Don’t forget if you interested in getting some loving support and focus on your journey, to enquire with me about the Fertile Foundation Powercircle.

Forgiveness and Fertility

Have I got your attention!

Have I got your attention!

Dear Fertility Buddies

I belong to this website called With Forgiveness.  They discuss all aspects of forgiveness-  have live teleclasses/conference calls and lots of other interesting titbits.  You can sign up for their daily inspiration too.   The reason why I am sharing this with you is because being able to let go of any bitterness and resentment towards anybody – but often someone in particular, and it might even be yourself – is part of the fertility journey.  By letting go of the ‘poison’ in your mind and body, you will allow more positive energy to flow, and allow the possibility of wonderful and new things showing up!  (like a pregnancy!)   When we hold on to our resentments and bitterness, we are literally carrying baggage in our psyche.  This is an opportunity to unburden yourself.

In fact a lovely woman I interviewed on my radio show Stephanie Webb, shared how using a coach to practice ‘letting go’ was a very powerful part of the process she went through to support herself during her infertility journey.  (you can listen to the archived podcast, by clicking on the link KTC Radio on the right hand side of the page)

I personally know how powerful it is to let go of feeling bitter and resentful towards someone (my mum)  – it used to cause depression, illness, and prevented me from the possibility of having any kind of relationship with her.  So I was really hurting myself.   Once I had had the experience and opportunity to ‘let go’ and forgive – and that doesn’t mean forgetting or condoning,  I felt so much lighter and free.  And I also had the experience of having a new wonderful relationship with my mum (and it wasn’t perfect…).  How thankful I was when my mother died suddenly 5 years after we had repaired our relationship.  I feel totally at peace with myself, and am so grateful to have had that time with her, where we could really be there for each other.  Now I am not saying that forgiveness will necessarily bring you a renewed relationship with the person you have in mind, but it will help you to move beyond the drama and poison that is holding YOU back, not them.  So this is in your best interests not theirs.

Your body literally produces poison when you harbor ill feeling.  So this is part of the process to do everything in your power to be emotionally and spiritually ready to accept a baby into your life.

Here is the link for this wonderful website.


Susyn and Sheri, who are the hosts, will be hosting a live call on Tuesday evening.  Check it out!  (what have you got to lose….and what have you got to gain!)   The subject for this event is:  Forgiveness in Action – Simple Techniques for Big Results

If you have second thoughts – think again.  Think hard.  Everyone I know holds resentment for someone or something – unless they have done work on it, and keep doing the work to resolve it!
(I will post a link for the website under Links for future reference)

so lovingly, and with forgiveness

Coach Louise Crooks

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