Tag Archive | babies

Fertility Journey Survey: Findings

Many women would have liked the support of a fertility coach from the beginning of the fertility journey and believe it would have reduced much confusion, fear, frustration, overwhelm, and the slide toward depression.

In February 2012, I began surveying women about their experience with the pursuit of parenthood and the fertility challenges that came up for them. By the end of March, I closed the survey so that I could take some time to organize and reflect on what participants had shared with me.

Depending on the ability to coordinate schedules and each woman’s desired level of participation, some surveys were conducted on the phone, in person, or via an electronic form. Much of the survey content is derived from the story-telling of each journey, but there were some yes/no and categorized-answer questions as well.

While each journey is significantly unique, there are some very clear common threads, the most obvious one being the focused, driving desire to become a parent. This focus is usually directed toward becoming pregnant, but sometimes intended parents find themselves making choices from a menu they had never considered part of their palette.

Here are some of the highlights:

93% of survey respondents have had, are having, or plan to have fertility treatments of one kind or another. Treatments are defined as actions on the physical body to enhance chances of conception and delivery. These actions may include acupuncture, herbs, dietary changes, application of oral or injectable medications or hormones, medical investigative procedures, and surgeries.

67% of participants who are no longer trying to conceive and deliver their first child said they would have liked the support of a fertility coach during their fertility journey. Many sought out support from online forums and friends who had also experienced challenges. Many expressed an interest in a managed and directed support group for women specifically going through same treatment protocols provided by fertility clinics. Many also believed that having the support of a fertility coach from the beginning of the journey would have reduced much confusion, fear, frustration, overwhelm, and the slide toward depression.

On average, women tried for 3 or more years before actually conceiving and carrying to term or giving up on the idea of carrying their own baby. This includes women experiencing secondary infertility as well as those trying to have their first baby.

It surprised me that only 17% of the women I surveyed were considering adoption or had found adoption to be the right answer for them. Those who have adopted are consistently and markedly passionate about their choice, and they generally feel moved to encourage others to include this option on their list of possibilities.

In general, the use of donor eggs and the option of surrogacy were not included in the vision of possibilities even when I asked the question directly. The idea of donor eggs evoked sadness at the thought that they would not be part of the makeup of their child. Some women were turned off by the cost of these two options, which is interesting in light of the fact that almost 20% would consider adoption even with it’s high cost. However, it is informative to remember that foster-to-adopt programs greatly reduce the cost.

94% of the women I surveyed responded that they experienced a couple or all of the following feelings: failure; disappointment; betrayal.

67% of the participants believe they would make different choices if they were to rewind and start over. The most popular changes mentioned include:

~ Moving forward with life goals and activities instead of putting life on hold while trying to conceive
~ Letting the desire to be a parent affect them sooner rather than waiting for the “right” time
~ Discontinuing relationships that got in the way of pursuing the desire to become parents
~ Getting clear on the desire to be parents and seeking help sooner
~ Pursuing satisfying information and answers, no longer tolerating unanswered questions and confusion

Although there are plenty of other larger, more clinical and academic surveys done in this area, I wanted to do my own query into the things that struck me personally as important considerations. The questions I created were initially sparked from reflecting on my own fertility challenges and the desire to have a fuller understanding of the vast range of experiences encountered on this path. I have learned so much by connecting with the survey participants and their stories, and I know that the quality of the service I can provide has improved as a result of this expanded perspective.  Thank you to everyone who contributed and participated.

If you are interested in sharing your fertility journey story with me — whether you’re just beginning, are in the middle of it, or have moved on — I would love to hear from you. Please contact me in any of the ways mentioned on my Contact Page. If you have comments or thoughts about the results I’ve presented here, please share in the comments thread below the post.

Have you been the partner, friend, or relative of someone facing fertility challenges? I’d love to hear your observations of their journey too. Please contact me using any of the ways presented on my Contact Page.

I look forward to hearing from you and thanks for reading.

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Coach Louise and Coach Julie

Dear blog reader,

Coach Louise began this blog with the intention that it be a place to share stories, ask questions, get support in a safe place of understanding and compassion, as well as a source for information on the topic of infertility, miscarriage, treatments etc. I am so excited to be taking over the administration of the blog and continuing on the mission of supporting you on your unique fertility journey. If you’d like to know more about me and what I offer, please click About Julie or visit Whole Vision Coaching. I’m so glad you’re here. Most importantly, I really want you to understand that you are not alone and this part of your adventure does not define who you are.

Having experienced the frustrations of unexplained infertility personally, I recognize that the experience can be isolating when the people around you don’t necessarily understand what you are going through. It is also often the first crisis couples come up against where there is really no control over the outcome. I want to connect with you and give you as much support as possible to lead a life full of joy and balance no matter the outcome of your pursuit of parenthood. I can also help to guide you and propose different alternatives that you might not have considered yet from a purely objective point of view.

Ultimately, I can offer you a space like a comfy sofa that you can fall into to feel comforted and reassured and so much more while on this unexpectedly challenging journey.

With love,
Coach Julie

CNN-How to have a baby when its not so simple

http://www.cnn.com/2008/HEALTH/08/07/ep.fertility/index.html

Cutie pies all!

Cutie pies all!

Hi all ,  just including this link to an interesting article by CNN, that you might have some interest in.  Some interesting facts on what not to do, if you are trying to fall pregnant… men not taking hot baths or hot tubs, and what to do… get a support buddy!  I am a big proponent of that! as you all know.  Enjoy!In the interests of baby-making,

Coach LouisePS FYI, I realised there was an OOPSEY with the website address on the About Louise page for the Coaching Federation. That has now been corrected!

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Christine’s Power Circle

My friend Christine Clifton – a coach, coaching individuals with chronic fatigue and pain,  invited me to be her client on her new Power Circle yesterday.  It was an interesting experience, and as the title says Powerful.  Some of you might know that I get cluster headaches or occular migraines, so she was able to coach me on managing my energy.  It was a great reminder that coaches need coaches!  I found it very helpful, and I was glad to help Christine with her first meeting.    i had a shift on the pattern of energy I have created through overstimulation and through experience when having migraines, which has translated to when I don’t!!   Very interesting.   I have now set some action steps to support myself in managing my energy –   to finish working at 5pm, and to read my books in the evening as a relaxing activity.   I can keep working until very late, so this is great.    Managing energy is a great topic for women facing infertility challenges, and going through the IVF treatments etc.   I will use this as a topic for my radio show!  Keep your eyes peeled!  www.blogtalkradio.com/KeystoClarity-coach

Coaching question for today:  What are you doing to manage your energy?

I appreciate your comments and questions!

love, peace and prosperity,

Coach Louise Crooks

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Creating Balance while Conceiving Life

The presentation I did last week at the Virtual Holistic Telesummit went really well.  There was a lot of valuable information packed in to a short space of time, but the audience got a lot from it!  Of course there are wonderful bonuses going out with my package if you decided to get the CDs, these are an in depth consultation as to how coaching might help you on your fertility journey, as well as a Tip Sheet titled:  8 Tips on how to manage your Relationship while going through Fertility Treatments.   The focus of the talk was about preparing yourself for the fertility journey – to create balance and set your self up to de-stress or keep stress-free!  Creating a context for the experience!  The recording will be available on the CD package.

Don’t forget there are lots of different speakers on different health topics, so click on the ‘Virtual Holistic Summit’ under Event, and register so you can get all the info for the free calls!

Enjoy!

Coach Louise Crooks

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Louise’s Journey

I have  started juicing! Its great – I love it.  It makes me feel alive!   I am working on ‘completions’ or ‘deletions’ at the moment –  getting little projects done, or finishing off things that have been waiting half finished!  Its a very freeing feeling, and creates more space and energy to allow new things to come into my life!   I started playing some tennis with Clive (hubbie) which I love!  I am not very good at it, but just doing something fun, takes the ‘exercise’ out of it!  and it gets the blood flowing! (very important)   I will also start my ayurvedic herbs this week….I am open on that one, not sure what to expect!    Clive is being very supportive of the process, and is helping by creating a menu of our meals for the week, so we eat well and healthily.  I am very lucky to have a man who loves to cook!      My coaching question this week is:  What can you do to get support around something you are doing that is important to you?    Feel free to comment, it will be great feedback for me, as well as helping others to grow as they read this blog!

Louise x   Have a great week!

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Update on Virtual Summit!

I really encourage any of you who are desiring a healthy lifestyle in preparation for becoming pregnant or going through a fertility treatment to attend this summit!  It is virtual!  So you don’t need to fly anywhere – you can listen and participate in the comfort of your living room.  There will be alll sorts of wonderful information on health, and there will be a couple of presenters including myself, who will be focusing on health and fertility issues.  My topic is titled  ‘ Creating Balance while Conceiving Life’  – I am really excited to be able to discuss the different areas of Mind, Body, and Spirit to give tips on really being able set up some rituals or new habits that really support you in the goal of becoming a mother!  There are some wonderful bonues available, and the teleseminars are free!  So check it out!   See the link on the right side of the page and in the post below!

Louise x

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